My Husband Watches YouTube All Day, Pushes Conspiracy Theories on Me

The Yomiuri Shimbun

15:24 JST, May 18, 2025

Dear Troubleshooter:

I’m a temporary employee in my 50s. My husband, who is the same age as me, only works about 10 days a month as he developed angina about five years ago.

Now, on his days off, he watches YouTube all day. It has been difficult because he completely believes in conspiracy theories he found through the site and keeps pushing them on me.

My husband often gets angry and says, “The TV and newspapers don’t tell the truth.” When I say, “Let’s talk about something fun,” he turns his anger on me and says, “You have nothing going on up there.” I try not to talk to him.

It’s really hard to have someone bad-mouthing and shouting at me every day.

My son lives on his own far away, and my daughter doesn’t like my husband, so she is getting ready to live on her own. I’m afraid he will get worse after my daughter moves out. I feel depressed when I come home from work.

There are many videos on YouTube that are not real. How can I make him realize that he should not believe them so easily?

— S, Osaka Prefecture

Dear Ms. S:

It’s not nice to be around people who believe in conspiracy theories and have them push those theories on you. It is natural that you want someone to stop believing in stories that are not true and to stop pushing their ideas on you.

Even though he is your husband, he is still his own person. No matter what you say, he won’t change.

Moreover, YouTube and other sites make it easy for people to only see similar content based on their browsing history. This means your husband will believe what he watches even more.

Given this, it is best to assume that your husband is unlikely to figure out what is true on his own.

If so, the only thing you can do is try to physically distance yourself from your husband. This might be the reason why your son has moved far away and why your daughter wants to live alone.

I believe the time has come for you to think about how you can live while keeping a distance from your husband, rather than trying to change his behavior and way of thinking.

Don’t think about this all by yourself. Talk to your children and friends to find a way to stay away from him.

You should not hold out hope for this, but it is possible he could change his behavior if he feels inconvenienced by you keeping your distance.

— Yutaka Ono, psychiatrist