My Father’s Cooking Is Terrible, and the Joy Has Gone from Eating

The Yomiuri Shimbun

14:17 JST, November 16, 2025

Dear Troubleshooter:

I’m a female college student in my teens. I don’t like my father, mainly because his cooking is terrible.

Maybe it’s because my mother is no good at cooking, but he always wants to cook meals, which is his hobby. He used to live away from the family because of his work, so I only had to tolerate his cooking about once every three weeks.

But since his work assignment finished and he returned home, he has been cooking dinner every weekend. His meals are bland, and the table is always filled with vegetables and fish. There’s hardly any meat. None of us enjoy eating anymore — except for him.

He lets me cook every now and again, but I can’t do it all the time.

We all want to tell him that his cooking is terrible, but no one dares to say anything because he’s scary when he gets angry.

When I’m eating, I try to show him that it’s unpleasant by putting on a sour face or sighing, but nothing has worked.

There are plenty of other things I dislike about him, but I think most of those things would be solved if his cooking were just a little bit better. Is there any way to improve his cooking?

N, Osaka Prefecture

Dear Ms. N:

They say food enriches life. It must be quite painful to be forced to eat something you don’t like, especially on weekends, which should be enjoyable. While I sympathize with you, I cannot help but smile as I read your story.

Many college students skip meals with their families because they are busy with part-time jobs or school club activities. You, however, faithfully gather around the table with your family.

Although you are saying you dislike your father, I suspect you actually care about him deeply. I think you recognize how kind he is when he tries hard to help your mother, who is not so good at cooking.

Your father, meanwhile, must be well aware that his cooking is unwelcome, but he’s enduring that. Even though you don’t say the food is awful, he must know you don’t like it, since you grimace and sigh deeply.

In short, you have a heartwarming family, and you care deeply for each other.

You are only one step away from solving the problem. Why don’t you tell him that it would be nice, for example, if he could adjust the seasoning of his very special dishes to suit the tastes of the younger ones in your family?

You could tell him, “None of my friends are lucky enough to be able to taste their fathers’ cooking.”

Just remember to say it with a smile, not a scowl.

Masami Ohinata, university president